Monday, March 13, 2006

Stupid and naive

That would be me. I found an email dated Feb 17/06 (have to check his account because that is where the cable and hydro bill come in still). I have been checking the account periodically for the bills and have seen other emails there but have never looked at them or anything but this one suddenly caught my attention because it said in the title line something about requested information on Jacuzzi suite from a hotel so I clicked on it. It appears that he was requesting info on booking a room for 2 with a double sauna/jacuzzi bath in a smoking room for 2 adults for the week of March 25 to the 31/06. So I phoned him. He is still denying that there was an affair but he did admit he is now with Denise. The lady from work he was giving a ride back and forth to work. So the whole time he was in his big depression and I was telling the kids to give him the benefit of the doubt he was lying and cheating and had another woman. His new email address on the 17th of February was happyone@whateveretcetc so he's a happy guy! So two weeks before I am to begin treatment and 2 days after we went and looked at a condo he walks out and then lets me believe he is distraught and on and on and on.

Josh phoned me just after I found the email and said I just got an email from dad so I phoned him and he moved out of his suite at his friends house cause of too many rules or something and right now he is house sitting for someone but they will be back on the 21st so he wants to know if he can stay with me from the 21st to the 25th and then on the 25th he has to go away for work for a week to train some other guys. I didn't say anything. Ryan knows cause he heard me yelling at Al on the phone. I was feeling so sorry for him and how much pain he was in. How stupid I feel.


carol said...

I don't think you are stupid, and nor should you. You were giving him the best support you could given the situation as it was.
There is a saying over here, 'the wife is always the last to know'!
Won't stop it hurting but it might allow you to move on without worrying about him as you were.
Sorry to read this, we have had many chats since the start of the year and I'm still around if you need to talk.
As to him, I've surprised myself here by not using every expletive in the book! He has no right to use a kind, loving and supportive lady like this.
Take care, move on and enjoy your life without giving him a thought.

peter said...

Something very similar happened to a friend of mine a couple of years back. Her husband (who was a friend of mine at the time) was also playing the depression card while having an affair with a co-worker (better yet, an employee). You're not stupid. You were simply acting based on the best available information at the time.

Focus on taking the best care of yourself that you can, with Hep C and otherwise. From all I've read, you're an extraordinary person (and an excellent photographer). All my best.


misspoppy said...

Hi Elizabeth Ann
You are such a warm, loving and sympathetic person and by no means is that stupid. What is stupid is that selfish man let you go. From where I am standing you just know its all going to smack him right back in his face given a little time. You are a diamond make no mistake there.
Miss Poppy x

david loren said...

It does amaze me how thoughtless, selfish and plain assed mean spirited humans can be.. Especially the ones we put our love and trust in. I do not know if you are a religious person but I feel God took him out of your life for a reason, that reason is you need to focus on you, I'm 3 weeks into my treatment Type 1a so I'll be at it for awhile. Needed to see some other Hep-c people so I don't feel like the long ranger. Be strong for yourself like I'm sure you've always been strong for your family.. it is YOUR turn..GBU