Saturday, February 11, 2006
The sun shines
The sun is shining here in BC and it makes such a difference. I came home from work last night and spent an hour and a half tidying up plants and cleaning the porch and getting my porch swing put back up. Trees are starting to bud out. Maybe too early, we could have another cold spell. I brought home a new Rhodo called Bow Belles, a beautiful pink hydrangea called Pink Parfait, a pretty pink fragrant lilac called Fairy Dust and a Winged Burning Bush. Khushwinder got the bridge finished and planted a weeping blue atlas at one end. We are going to train it to run down the one side. The garden up there is really starting to come together.
Al and I have been emailing and Ryan and I have been talking and the plan is now that we will be here in this house for six months with a plan to move into an apartment or townhouse by September 1st. Then Al may move back in here and finish up the few things I can't manage and then give our notice. I'm going to try and keep both dogs unless Al feels he can take Kody. The marriage is over. It was Al that made the move and if he had not I would have stayed in the marriage forever but now that he has made the move and I'm getting used to the idea I am realizing that we had grown apart in many ways. I'm finding that more and more I like being on my own. I can do what I want when I want. I'm lonely some days but that's to be expected.
For the first time in my life I'm on my own with nobody to answer to or be responsible for. Ryan is here but he's an adult and if I don't feel like coming home after work it's no big deal. I'm making plans to do the things I've always wanted to do. I want to travel and go camping and maybe retire someday to the Island. Al's not the bad guy and there is nobody in the wrong here. He just recognized the situation where I did not. I'm happier this week than last. I think it will just get easier from here. I know there will still be bad days but I think I've turned the corner now.
Josh got home from India today and he's looking very well and had a great time. He brought Christina home a little outfit with some braceletts, a necklace, anklet and the little dots in different colours she can wear. She tried it all on and it looked so cute. When he was in Thailand last time he brought her an outfit from there as well. After she had tried on the stuff from today she insisted on putting on her Thailand dress as well. Had to take pictures. She was so cute. This first one she is decked out in her outfit from India and was being told to do a dance so she was shaking her leg.
The second picture is her in the little outfit from Thailand. She has on her anklet.
I know I'm going to have to start treatment again but I have to wait awhile until I get settled into a new place. In the meantime I am just going to carry on and continue to take care of myself as I have been anyway. I'll make a doctor's appointment in the next week or two and go every three months and get my bloodwork done and see how I'm feeling.